HONEST AND BALANCED CONTENT

            One of the main conclusions of this conversation is that people who adhere to the rule of "HFL" are not afraid to be happy, and they do not shy away from talking about it on their social media. Moreover, they understand that honest and positive content can become a point of support for both the rear and the frontlines.

            Many social media users have gone quiet since the beginning of the war. When they do post, these are usually re-posts of news or messages full of grief, hatred, and suffering. They do not share their real lives, even, and especially, if (especially if!) these are peaceful and safe lives that are filled with happy moments. The further they are from grief and suffering, the stronger their feeling of guilt for their well-being. In their opinion, demonstrating a normal, let alone joyful, life is inappropriate and can become a trigger for others.

            An interesting observation: social media is once again imposing its templates on users, producing in them a sense of inadequacy and guilt.  Before, the overt demonstration of luxury and hypertrophied perfection (conditional 90-60-90 measurements in all spheres of life) exacerbated the feeling of inadequacy in the content user (e.g., not beautiful enough, not smart enough, not rich enough, not successful enough, etc.). Now we have a new problem: I don't grieve enough, I haven't donated enough money to the army, I don't experience the horror of war enough.

            A girl will not record stories on Instagram with an unwashed head and bags under her eyes. First, she will style her hair and put on makeup, then she will get in the car or settle down at a table in a cute establishment with a nice cup of coffee. Likewise, the new "trend" does not accept "no makeup" content: if it's a tragedy, it has to be amplified and overstated, just like volunteering, donations, or hatred towards the enemy or those with different views.

            Those who follow this trend and are being hypocritical on social media bear more responsibility for the content they publish than people who still post about their happy and bright lives as if there was no war. The latter are still in the state of denial - the first stage of acceptance. Their psyche refuses to accept reality and adapt to new conditions. The former are often people who already adapted to the war, but either truly do not allow themselves to live, or are being dishonest. In either case, they unconsciously harm not only themselves but also those who read or watch them.

            The human psyche is not made for permanent suffering. If we bombard our brain with an endless stream of unhappiness, it will forget about the neurotransmitters of happiness. Accumulating grief is fraught with emotional burnout, exhaustion, depressive episodes, and then full-blown depression. To avoid this, it's essential that after every shock we allow ourselves to experience a dose of happiness to let the brain register a happy moment that will leave a corresponding positive mark in our body and mind.

            Here's an example: In the past, the sight of the first snow immediately filled social media feed with pictures, videos and inspirational posts. This winter is different: the appearance of the first snow caused physical and emotional pain. It's hard to be happy when our guys are in the trenches. It's cold there. But if since your childhood you've been charmed by the crunch of fresh snow or enjoyed the first white patches of fluffy and soft harbingers of approaching winter holidays, don't break this long-established neural happiness pathway. Feel the crunchy snow in your hand, and then go do all you can for the military, for volunteers, and for your loved ones. But first, touch the snow, capture the Happy Moment, take a photo, and share it with others.

            This is important. And not just for you. In the dark moments, people subconsciously crave positivity, a break from grieving. They also look for it on social media when they scroll through their feed in the evening after an emotionally tense day. And what's in the feed? Same sorrow, despair, and fear. But what about a glimmer of hope? Your picture of the first snow or a cup of coffee or a video from the gym can be that glimmer. In between the air raids and strings of sad news, life keeps going on, and that's the main message that prevents a person from giving up and falling into an emotional stupor.

            By publishing exclusively negative content and ignoring regular life, you are definitely not supporting   those who are defending our right to live on the frontlines. Because what does a soldier see when he manages to catch his breath and take a moment for social media? He sees that his efforts are in vain, that he's not doing enough, because people in the rear are still suffering, no matter how hard he fights for their safety and well-being. It would be much more helpful for him to know that the country he is risking his life for is persisting and moving forward despite the enemy. A good illustration is family life. If a husband earns money, provides for his family, and "fights" on the job front, and his wife is constantly dissatisfied and nagging, sooner or later he'll give up.

            People who are hungry for life post honest and balanced content. Throughout the day, their stories feature everything from coffee and the first snow to mourning, a child's birthday, donations, ice skating, work successes, candlelit dinners, and much more - all honest and balanced. Lying and conforming to an imposed narrative only happens when there is a fear of making mistakes, which is a sign of immaturity.

            Maturity, on the other hand, is the ability to preserve oneself so that someone else can rely on you. It is internal stability and courage, to be honest with yourself and others. In difficult times, whether offline or in your feed, you should have someone you can rely on. One should strive to be such a person, someone with enough optimism and life energy for themselves and for that guy in the trenches.